With all the newswires going gaga over the Olympics it is getting kinda hard to find the ‘real news’! Here are a few that might have slipped under your radar while watching that Norwegian ref throw a darned fine soccer match!

Bound for glory with latte in hand? – Robinson Funeral in Easley, S.C., has announced it will open a Starbucks on its premises later this summer. The coffee shop will be part of a new wing being added to the building. Funeral-goers who eschew $5 coffee can still get the home-brewed stuff for free. And should you find yourself walking past the funeral home and craving a caffeine kick, the Starbucks will be open to the public. Will that be decaf or extra ‘stiff’?

Time to layoff the coffee? – A 40-year-old Tennessee man allegedly became enraged when he saw a picture of a strange man on his girlfriend’s Facebook page and suspected she was planning an affair — he apparently didn’t recognize presidential hopeful Mitt Romney. Lowell Turpin, 40, “angrily demanded to know who the male was,” according to a police report cited by the Knoxville News Sentinel. When she told him, he allegedly grabbed her laptop and smashed it into a wall, then punched her. Turpin remains in custody. He probably would have recognized a pic of Andy Griffith.

But is it Beluga or Sturgeon? – Wendy’s is upping the burger ante in Japan with the release of a new lobster and caviar burger. The fast food giant will offer specialty seafood burgers beginning at the end of this month for a limited time, spokesman Bob Bertini said. One of the burgers features lobster claw meat, lobster salad and caviar, the other a beef patty with lobster claw meat. Costs ranged from $16 to $20 each. I dunno but it seems this is like having a Lemon Dover Sole with french fries.

One way to urn a living – A man who sold brass flower urns for scrap that had been stolen from a cemetery has been sentenced to 85 days in jail. Bjay William Ravenhorst, 33, pled guilty Tuesday to defrauding a scrap dealer, possession of urns stolen from two cemeteries, possession of stolen power tools and morphine along with court order violations. Ravenhorst sold 16 urns to a scrap dealer on Jan. 24 and 26 that had been stolen from headstones. Thirty-four urns had been stolen from the two cemeteries. Trading in such stolen objects is “despicable,” said assistant Crown attorney Aniko Coughlan, who called for a 90-day jail sentence. Maybe he was saving up for one of those Starbuck lattes from Robinson’s…

Like making a Melt with Limburger – “Stop pants fires,” the Dorset Fire and Rescue Service tweeted on Monday after a U.K. man nearly burned down his apartment using his microwave as a clothes dryer. Fire crews were called to the second-floor flat in the seaside town of Weymouth, the BBC reports. A spokeswoman told the news service the fire began after the resident of the flat tried to dry his socks and underwear in the microwave. The man was rescued and the fire put out before it could cause serious damage. Aren’t you glad Jockeys don’t come with metal buckles?